Teresa

Back when I was 14, there was this chick, Teresa, who used to come over to my grandmothers house with my cousins girlfriend. She was hot, very hot. Blonde hair, a body carved out of humpstone, she had a great smile thanks to braces, but the best thing about her was her pink nosed puppies. These things were huge; tits of a goddess. They looked like giant marshmallows; big, soft and ready to be licked.

She was about 4 years older than me, but that didn’t stop me from trying to make a move on her. It was during the summer, the 4th of July to be exact; my entire family was at the lake. Teresa and I were inside playing Mario Brothers on the Nintendo. She was wearing boxer shorts and a t-shirt over her bikini and I was getting the vibe that she wanted to bang me. I made my move by putting my hand on her leg. I then started to move my hand up her thigh and she cut me off by removing my hand and asking me: What in the hell are you doing? I was crushed by the embarrassment, and even more crushed when some of my older cousins found out about this and started calling me 'Stiffy'. Oh yea, Teresa also saw that in my haze of lust for her, I had developed quite the erection.

From then on I avoided going over to my grandmothers when Teresa was there and I was successful in avoiding her until yesterday...

Twice a month I have a maid service come out and clean my house. For about the last year, an older black woman named Odette has been my cleaning lady. She’s very quiet, just comes in, says hello and then gets the job done. I always buy her a 2 Liter Dr. Pepper and this time I was going to give her a jar of my grandmother’s homemade pickles.

The only problem is that Odette hurt her back and the maid service had to send another maid, Teresa. Yes, the same Teresa who was so hot several years back is now a cleaning lady. Mind you, I’m not talking down on cleaning women, but Teresa was a #1 draft pick back in the day. I guess she would rank as an all time draft bust; a Ryan Leaf or a Tony Mandarich or an Alex Smith.

Her blonde hair has been replaced with pork-n-bean brown. Her body, while still not real bad, is now worn, and those great marshmallow tits look as if they have been roasted over a campfire. Her left arm has been biker ganged in that from her hand to her elbow is now covered in tattoos. I have seen some women make tattoos look sexy, almost classy. Unfortunately, Teresa is not one of those women. To be fair, it would be tough for any woman to make a skull with a rebel flag background painted on her forearm look sexy. Maybe Marisa Miller or Jessica Alba could pull it off, but I highly doubt it.

I didn’t even recognize Teresa. Once I let her in, I went out and did some shopping. After I got home and was upstairs checking out TI, Teresa opened the door and said: Hey, Stump. Come here when you get a minute. I thought this was strange since she had been calling me Mr. Lastname the entire time. I went down and she said: Do you realize who I am? I thought maybe she was one of America’s Most Wanted or maybe a washed out porno star. I looked at her for a little bit and then said:

Stump: No, I have no idea who you are.
Teresa: I’m Teresa. Beth’s friend. I used to come over to your grandmothers all the time.

The first thing that popped into my mind was what happened at the lake that day and all that embarrassment came rushing back. The only thing I could say was: I used to have the biggest crush on you.

We talked for a while and then I went back upstairs. Probably 15 minutes later, she came up there and said: You know how you used to have a crush on me? Well, I have a crush on you.

After saying that she just stood there staring at me. I didn’t know what to say so I said:

Stump: Aren’t you married?
Teresa: Yes, but he’s in jail.
Stump: So what do you want to do?
Teresa: You

Through all the tattoo ink and the stringy hair and the mechanic rag look she had going on, I could still see that #1 draft pick, so I said: What the hell and proceeded to beat her brakes off right there on the floor of my upstairs. She smelled like cigarettes and commode cleaner, but all in all she wasn’t a bad lay. Once I finished her off, she went back downstairs, finished cleaning, took her pickles and left. I spent the rest of the day catching up on my DVR and feeling vindicated. To be honest, today I feel even better about myself. I don't even look back on that day at the lake and feel embarrassment